why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Randomize
