i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize