My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
