And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
