Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Is Oprah even human
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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