Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
