"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
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