I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
