went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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