Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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