She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
