is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
that's an acceptable place to lick
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
