she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
