I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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