I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize