are you still at the devil's house?
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
