Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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