Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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