My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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