dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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