Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
