party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize