There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
