I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
organizing the empties. That sober.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
