so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize