i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
