if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
