i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize