so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
