we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
