I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I woke up under a house in Key West
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
