I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
