absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
