It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
