You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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