After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
