I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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