worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize
