Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize