But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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