I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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