Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
