I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
