And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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