with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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