I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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