I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
