shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i wish my penis had a tongue
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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