Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
