Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
