He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
