DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Acid is not a monday night drug
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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